An Eternity of Angst

No matter how well things are going, and no matter how solid you are spiritually, there is always room enough to screw it up. Often, it doesn’t take a lot to screw things up – just one word, one sour expression, one thing forgotten. Life is fragile and human relations are more fragile still. If you do not realize where your fingers end, how can you be sure you are not bruising others?

Maybe I am the liar…

There is a sense of eternal frustration that veins its way through my life. I am able to restrain myself from foolishness, but only for a while. I am able to walk the line but for only a few moments. I see my reflection in the eyes of others and I despise it. Yet if I conform myself to their wishes, I will become a man with no spine.

I feel your fire…

I will not live in the ruins. I will not let my failures strand me on some isle of monsters. It is only that I dislike tasting the angst – the alienation – the separation between my soul and my flesh. I long for oneness, for unity, for an end to my unknowing self-sabotage.

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